Riding a horse to find a donkey in emotions

Riding a horse to find a donkey usually refers to the behavior of seeking other opportunities despite having a stable relationship, reflecting dissatisfaction or greed towards the current relationship. This behavior may be triggered by factors such as unmet emotional needs, lack of novelty, blurred sense of self-worth, avoidance of deeper issues, and social environmental influences.

When one party feels lonely or neglected for a long time in a relationship, they may seek to fill the emotional gap by seeking external help. These people often lack effective communication skills, fail to express their true needs, and instead use covert methods to gain attention. Typical manifestations include frequent comparisons of partner's shortcomings with others' strengths, and excessive glorification of potential substitute traits.

2. Lack of freshness

The fading of passion in long-term relationships can stimulate some people to pursue excitement. The brain's reward mechanism is more sensitive to novel things, leading to a shift in attention towards new encounters with the opposite sex. This situation is common when the relationship enters a period of calm, and the parties mistakenly see the normal emotional development stage as a signal of relationship failure.

Thirdly, the vague sense of self-worth

is a common psychological compensation mechanism for obtaining a sense of need through multiple relationships. This group of people often rely on external recognition to confirm their self-worth. When the primary relationship cannot provide strong affirmation, they will maintain psychological balance by developing alternative relationships. This behavior often hides a tendency towards inferiority or excessive narcissism.

Fourth, avoid deep-seated problems

by finding a spare tire to avoid substantive contradictions in the relationship. The parties involved may fear the pressure of commitment in intimate relationships or lack the ability to resolve conflicts. Diverting energy into multiple shallow relationships can not only avoid facing core conflicts directly, but also maintain a superficial sense of emotional security.

V. Social Environmental Influence

The convenience of social media and certain cultural concepts can reinforce this behavior pattern. Excessive exposure to social media platforms for marriage and love may lower the threshold of relationship loyalty, leading to a misunderstanding of multi line relationships as the norm of modern marriage and love. Some subculture groups even use the number of spare tires as an indicator of personal charm. Improving this behavior requires establishing a healthy understanding of intimate relationships. Exploring the root causes of unmet needs through partner counseling and learning nonviolent communication skills to accurately express emotions. Regular relationship review can help identify avoidance patterns and cultivate realistic expectations for long-term relationships. Restricting the frequency of social media usage can reduce sources of temptation, while developing shared interests and hobbies can create new emotional connections. If there is a serious lack of value, it is recommended to undergo professional psychological assessment to rule out potential personality tendencies.

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