The common contradictory psychological state of both longing for marriage and rejection of marriage is usually related to personal growth experiences, emotional patterns, or social pressures. The desire for marriage often stems from an instinctive need for intimate relationships, including emotional support, life stability, and social identity. As social animals, humans have a natural tendency to establish long-term intimate relationships, and the marriage system can provide legal protection and socially recognized emotional belonging. Some people may be influenced by traditional cultural concepts, viewing marriage as a necessary stage in life, or hoping to achieve their desire to have children through marriage. A stable partner relationship can indeed help alleviate loneliness and cope with life pressures together, and this positive expectation will strengthen the longing for marriage. Exclusion emotions may come from indirect experiences of marital trauma or self-defense mechanisms. Witnessing the failure of a parent's marriage may lead to distrust of intimate relationships, and overly independent personality traits may worry about the constraints of marriage on personal development. The economic pressure and responsibility burden associated with contemporary marriage can also easily trigger avoidance reactions, and some people may have doubts about their self-worth and fear exposing their true selves in intimate relationships. The spread of marital conflict cases on social media can amplify awareness of marital risks, and the comfort zone formed by long-term singlehood can also reduce the motivation to change the status quo.
It is recommended that individuals with such conflicting emotions seek psychological counseling to clarify their core concerns, participate in marriage preparation courses to establish rational cognition, or try short-term cohabitation experiences to verify their actual feelings. Pay attention to distinguishing between social expectations and real needs, and marriage decisions should be based on full self-awareness, without the need to make hasty choices due to external pressure.
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