What if a child doesn't keep their word

Children who do not keep their promises can be improved through establishing rules, clarifying consequences, positive incentives, role models, patient guidance, and other methods. This situation is usually caused by cognitive development limitations, lack of responsibility, imitative behavior, emotional impulses, weak rule awareness, and other reasons.

1. Establishing Rules

Developing simple and clear family rules can help children understand the importance of commitment. The content of the rules should be specific and executable, such as stipulating that the daily TV viewing time should not exceed 30 minutes. Parents need to agree on rules with their children and post them in a prominent location in the form of pictures or charts. Maintain consistency during execution and avoid compromising due to children crying. In the early stages of rule establishment, tools such as timers can be used to assist children in complying.

2. Clarify the consequences

Pre informing children of the reasonable consequences of breach can enhance their sense of responsibility. The consequence design should be age appropriate, such as canceling the next day's game time or reducing snack share. Maintain a calm attitude during implementation and avoid emotional punishment. Parents need to clearly distinguish between intentional breach and forgetfulness, with the latter being handled through reminders. After each execution of the consequences, it is important to re emphasize the value of the rules and help children establish a cognitive connection between behavior and outcomes.

3. Positive motivation

Timely praise of compliance behavior can strengthen children's sense of trustworthiness. Using specific praise methods, such as "Turning off the TV on time today makes mom very proud". A point reward system can be established to accumulate a certain amount of points to exchange for opportunities for parent-child activities. Avoid excessive material rewards and focus on making children feel trusted through emotional feedback such as hugs. Recording children's examples of keeping their promises and regularly reviewing their progress can enhance their confidence.

4. Role Model Demonstration

Parents leading by example is the key to cultivating integrity qualities. Promise your child to fulfill their obligations, such as attending parent teacher conferences on time or bringing back promised picture books. If it is indeed impossible to fulfill the promise, the reason should be explained in person and an apology should be made. In daily life, you can share more examples of yourself keeping promises, such as "Dad promised his colleague to submit the report today, so he worked overtime to complete it". Through role-playing games, simulate various trustworthy scenarios to deepen children's understanding.

5. Patient guidance

It is necessary to understand that incomplete development of the prefrontal cortex in children leads to limited self-control. When a child breaches the contract, use questioning to guide reflection: 'What do you think should be done next?'. Avoid public criticism and choose to communicate gently in private. The meaning of integrity can be explained through picture book stories, such as classic fables like 'The Wolf Comes'. For children under 5 years old, the concept of time can be concretized, such as' when the needle reaches 6, we will set off '.

Cultivating children's trustworthy habits requires parents to continuously invest patience. Provide more opportunities to exercise decision-making skills in daily life, such as allowing children to decide whether to do homework or tidy up their backpacks first. Pay attention to the emotional state of children, as they are more likely to engage in breach of contract when they are tired or anxious. Regularly hold family meetings to discuss the implementation of rules and adjust reward and punishment methods appropriately. Eating foods rich in lecithin, such as eggs and beans, can help improve brain development and self-control. Maintaining regular outdoor activity time and releasing stress through exercise can also reduce emotional default. If there is no improvement or other behavioral problems for a long time, it is recommended to consult a child psychologist for evaluation.