How to comfort a child who doesn't want to live on campus

When children are unwilling to live on campus, parents can help alleviate their anxiety through emotional support, establishing a sense of security, and gradually adapting. Difficulty adapting to boarding may be related to factors such as separation anxiety, unfamiliar environment, and social pressure, and targeted measures should be taken based on the child's personality and needs.

1. Emotional Support

Accepting a child's emotions is the primary step. Parents should avoid denying or ignoring their children's resistance and use gentle language to express understanding, such as telling their children that it is normal to feel sad leaving home. Children can feel the continuous care of their families through fixed daily phone calls or videos. Sharing parents' childhood experiences can also reduce children's feelings of loneliness.

2. Establishing a sense of security

Helping children establish connections with their living environment can enhance their sense of security. Familiarize children with campus environments such as dormitories and canteens in advance, and establish connections with class teachers and life teachers. Encourage children to bring familiar toys, family photos, and other items, or use the same bedding at home in dormitory decoration. Clearly inform the visitation arrangements and emergency contact procedures to eliminate the child's fear of the unknown.

3. Gradual adaptation

adopts a progressive adaptation method to reduce stress. In the initial stage, it can be negotiated to pick up students on weekends, and the residential period can be extended with the degree of adaptation. Communicate with the teacher to allow children to carry their phones for the first few days and gradually reduce their usage frequency later on. Encourage children to keep a dormitory diary, and parents can engage in two-way communication with their children through text or pictures, forming a channel for emotional release.

4. Social guidance

can help children establish new interpersonal relationships and improve resistance. Practice making friends through role-playing conversations and prepare small gifts to encourage children to actively share with their roommates. Negotiate with the teacher to arrange activities for classmates with similar personalities to sit at the same table or in the same group. Regularly invite classmates to visit our homes and extend family support to the campus social circle.

5. Positive motivation

strengthens the growth value brought by boarding instead of emphasizing separation. Use specific examples to illustrate the independent ability cultivated in boarding school, such as organizing one's own backpack and receiving praise from teachers. Set phased small goals and provide non-material rewards such as choosing weekend activities after achieving them. Avoid linking residential performance with academic performance, and focus on affirming the child's ability to overcome difficulties. In addition to psychological counseling, attention should also be paid to the child's physiological state. Ensure the quality of weekend family time and prepare nutritious lunch boxes to supplement the insufficient school diet. Maintain communication with teachers and promptly identify potential issues such as campus bullying or learning disabilities. If anxiety is accompanied by persistent physical discomfort or low mood for more than two weeks, it is recommended to seek evaluation from a child psychologist. Establish a support network for home school collaboration to help children gradually transform boarding into a positive experience for growth.