Truly mature people have learned the compulsory course of 'letting go of themselves'

Have you ever had such an experience? At three o'clock in the morning, I was still pondering over the words I had said during the day. Even though I was so tired that I couldn't open my eyes, my brain was replaying awkward moments like a broken record player. Or working overtime for three consecutive months for a project, only to suddenly fall into the anxiety vortex of 'Did I do well enough' after completing the assignment. We always push ourselves to the corner in the pursuit of perfection, but forget that the most important sign of maturity is actually learning to let go at the right time.

Why do we always struggle to get through on our own?

1. The Trap of Perfectionism

There is a region in the brain called the "anterior cingulate gyrus" that is specifically responsible for picking mistakes. It is like an insatiable quality inspector, constantly reminding us that "this is not good enough" and "there is room for improvement". Evolution makes us particularly sensitive to mistakes, but this mechanism often operates excessively in modern society.

2. Invisible Harm of Social Comparison

Social media compresses everyone's highlights on the same screen, and we subconsciously compare our daily trivialities with other people's exciting moments. This unfair comparison will activate the pain center of the brain, like constantly sprinkling salt on a wound.

3. The psychological burden of excessive responsibility

"If I won't The thinking mode of '...' can keep people in a state of continuous stress. Studies have found that the levels of stress hormones secreted by the body during excessive self blame are almost equivalent to those when facing danger in real life.

2. Let go of three key cognitions

1. Allow 'good enough' to replace 'perfect'

Achieving a completion rate of 80% is worthy of recognition, and the remaining 20% is left for progress. German psychologists have found that people who are moderately satisfied with their performance actually achieve higher long-term success than perfectionists.

2. Distinguish between controllable and uncontrollable factors

Focus energy like a spotlight on things that can be changed. It's better to listen to a book than to get angry about traffic jams, and it's better to plan the next step than to regret past mistakes. This kind of thinking switch can reduce 40% of unnecessary anxiety.

3. Establish self compassion

Try to speak to yourself in a comforting tone towards your friends. Experiments have shown that during self compassion, the brain releases soothing substances similar to being hugged, which can quickly calm emotional storms.

3. Five Methods for Daily Practice of Letting Go

1. Set up an "Anxiety Time Box"

Set aside 15 minutes each day specifically for dealing with worries, and tell yourself to "store it in the box and deal with it later" if you have distractions during other times. This simple action can reduce invasive thinking by 37%.

2. Cultivate the habit of "pausing"

When emotions are about to get out of control, go to the bathroom and rinse your wrist with cold water. Low temperature stimulation can activate the vagus nerve, just like pressing a pause button on an overheated brain.

3. Create physical separation

Place an "off work bell" in the workspace, and immediately leave the office area after the bell rings. Space conversion sends clear mode switching signals to the brain.

4. Record small victories

Record three things you did right before going to bed every day, even if it's just "having lunch on time". Positive accumulation can reshape the brain's focus of attention.

5. Try the "minimum standard" day

Choose one day a week to complete only the most basic tasks, and prove through practice that the world will not collapse because of this. This experience can effectively loosen the shackles of perfectionism. Maturity is not about carrying heavier burdens, but about knowing how to unload them at the right time. Those who live transparently only understand one step earlier: the greatest wisdom in life is knowing when to hold tightly and when to let go. Give yourself a chance to catch your breath, and you will find that those once thought to be great regrets are just a speck of dust on the road to growth.