Three pitfalls that loving couples avoid, hitting the first one can be dangerous

When I was brushing my mobile phone late at night, I suddenly saw my friend's roast: "After three years of marriage, I have never said anything, and now even his voice of brushing his teeth can make me angry..." Is this scene inexplicably familiar? The sweet details of love can become overwhelming after marriage The last straw that breaks down emotions.

1. Take the other person's kindness for granted

1. Beware of the gentle trap of "getting used to it"

During the honeymoon period, remember to add a little sugar to the other person's coffee, but after marriage, you can't remember the last time you said thank you. The "sensory adaptation" in psychology will make continuous kindness invisible, just like the smell of perfume will gradually disappear. Try to record three small things your partner does every day, even if it's just handing over a tissue.

2. Don't let effort become a one-way street

There are always people complaining, 'I've done so much but he doesn't appreciate it,' maybe both sides are thinking the same way. Establish a simple gratitude ceremony, such as taking turns before bedtime to share the most grateful thing for the other person that day. Research has found that consistently expressing gratitude can increase marital satisfaction by 20%.

2. Using silence instead of communication

1. Cold violence is more hurtful than arguing

Falling out of the door is at least expressing emotions, and using a blank face to swipe your phone is the poison of a relationship. When the conversation turns into a turn based game of "um" and "oh", immediately start the "Five Minute Honesty Time": set an alarm and take turns speaking your true thoughts without interruption.

2. Avoid the blame trap of "you always"

The complete negation of "you never do housework" will instantly turn communication into a battlefield. Replace it with "the most I have been the one taking out the garbage the last three times. Can we adjust the division of labor? The formula of specific things and feelings can turn blame into negotiation.

3. Allowing outsiders to excessively intervene in marriage

1. "For your own good" from relatives and friends may be a chronic poison. Statistics show that 70% of marital conflicts escalate due to excessive involvement of third parties. Setting boundaries is not indifference, but protection of relationships.

2. Don't use children as emotional substitutes

Some mothers give all their tenderness to their children, leaving only impatience with their husbands. A healthy family relationship is an equilateral triangle, and marital relationships should always be prioritized. A fixed two-hour 'childless date' per week can effectively prevent emotional transfer.

You can open the memo here: Record the most When was the last time your partner's eyes lit up? The half cup of warm water left in the morning and the small night light left in the lobby during overtime are the real luxury items in marriage. Try saying 'Your tie is special today' at breakfast tomorrow, which may be more appealing than a wedding anniversary gift.