Not taking the initiative is the answer! 3 details to see through their true attitude

Have you ever encountered such a situation? The other party never contacts you proactively, but every time you send a message, they will reply; On a date, he/she appears very considerate, but after parting ways, it feels like he/she evaporates from the world. This ambiguous attitude is often more frustrating than simply refusing. In fact, in adult social norms, not being proactive is the most obvious signal, and these three details can help you quickly see through the other person's true thoughts.

1. Judging the level of engagement from chat records

1. Who is leading the pace of the conversation

Flipping through your WeChat dialogue box, who has the majority of green and white bubbles? If you always send long texts and the other person only responds with "hmm" or emojis, this unilateral output is like shouting into a valley, with sparse echoes. People who truly care about you will actively share fragments of their lives, such as taking photos of lunch or sharing funny videos.

2. Implicit message of reply interval

Modern people never leave their phones, and not replying after 24 hours is basically equivalent to not being able to read back. Occasional delays are understandable, but those who continuously receive messages are like always in an elevator with poor signal. Pay attention to those who always use "I was busy just now" as the opening line, as they may be juggling multiple dialog boxes at the same time.

3. The positivity of topic extension

A perfunctory chat is like playing ping pong, where every question is blocked back in its original form. When you say 'I'm tired from working overtime today', the other party only responds with 'hard work', and this conversation ends up on the serve line. And those who are willing to take the conversation will say, "Is your project very busy recently? My friend's company is also recruiting."

2. Importance level from offline contact

1. Difficulty level of scheduling a meeting

Always says "next appointment" but never gives a specific date to the person, just like the "coming soon" label in a convenience store. Observe if the other party is willing to adjust your schedule for you. If you are rejected eight out of ten last-minute invitations, your position on their priority list is already clear.

2. concentration during interaction

Although sitting across from each other, they are like people scrolling through their phones across the galaxy, with their bodies being more honest than their words. People who truly enjoy companionship will unconsciously adjust their sitting posture towards each other and remember the small things you mentioned, such as the three part sugar for milk tea.

3. Temperature difference in body language

The restrained physical contact of crossing the street with a virtual elbow and waving politely when saying goodbye are all emitting signals. Anthropologists have found that when a person points their toes towards an exit or frequently looks at their watch, their subconscious is already preparing to leave.

III. Real Interests from Social Dynamics

1. The Value of Online Interaction

Thumbs are the cheapest social currency, comments are the real investment. If someone writes a short essay on their mutual friend's social circle but only likes your posts, this differential treatment already indicates the problem.

2. Mentioning your frequency

Pay attention to how they describe your relationship at a friend gathering. There is a whole emotional account between 'I know someone' and 'I have a super interesting friend'. When they start using 'we' instead of 'me', it's the real way to bring you into the circle of life.

3. Absence of Future Tense

In conversations, future plans such as "I'll take you next time" and "I'll wait for you to try" never appear, just like a restaurant always only shows you the menu but doesn't let you order. The advancement of the relationship requires both parties to jointly draw a roadmap, and unilateral fantasies are ultimately a mirage. There is no sudden coldness in the adult world, only accumulated alienation. When you start repeatedly studying the other person's attitude, the answer is already written in those unsent messages. A good relationship should be like a warm-hearted treasure in winter, you don't need to desperately keep warm to continue warming up. Leave your energy on those who will leave a door for you, those hearts that require a password to enter may not have been knocked on in the first place.