Is the husband indifferent and not caring? Smart women respond in this way

Have you ever had the experience of working overtime until late at night and finding only cold leftovers on the dining table; When suffering from a cold or fever, the other party is too lazy to even offer a cup of hot water; You are always the only one preparing surprises for important anniversaries These details are like small thorns, slowly piercing into the marriage. But don't rush to sentence emotions to death, some ways of getting along are 100 times more effective than complaining.

First, eliminate the objective reasons for "emotional disconnection"

1. Differences in male emotional expression

The brain structure determines that men are better at solving problems rather than emotional resonance. When you say 'I'm tired today', he may directly give a rough plan of 'resign', which is actually his understanding of caring.

2. Temporary apathy caused by stress

During the critical period of the SEP project, men often enter "cave time", where even basic communication seems to be a waste of energy. Observe whether he is accompanied by signals such as insomnia and decreased appetite, which may be a warning from the body.

2. Reconstruct Communication Channels with Male Thinking

1. Translate Feelings into Needs

Instead of saying "You never care about me", it's better to replace it with "Can you accompany me to the follow-up on Wednesday? I'm a little scared alone". Specific and explicit requests can activate male action instincts.

2. Creating shared experiences

Completing a small task together is more effective than having heart to heart talks. Collaborating on weekends to assemble furniture, or taking on yoga for two, can stimulate the secretion of oxytocin, a hormone known as the 'hug hormone'.

3. Set up an emotional response mechanism

1. Establish an exclusive code [SEP]. It is agreed that when you say "I want to eat sweet and sour pork ribs", it means you need a hug; If he says' do it tomorrow ', it means he has received a signal. This secret code can avoid emotional interpretation that men are not good at.

2. Quantitative care indicators

do not require constant concern, but bottom line standards can be agreed upon. For example, delivering water at least three times during illness and having a handwritten birthday card. Clear rules are easier to enforce than vague expectations.

4. Beware of chronic emotional poisoning

1. Distinguish between apathy and cold violence

Long term intentional neglect of needs and devaluation of values is cold violence. True apathy often accompanies behavioral consistency and a lack of care for everyone, including oneself.

2. Set an observation period

of three months to record changes. If he is willing to make adjustments to the agreement, it indicates that it is only an expression barrier; If it continues to deteriorate, professional assistance may be required. Marriage is like tango between two people, if the dance steps are chaotic, it's better to count the beats again. Those unspoken concerns may be hidden in the hot water bottle that has been refilled for you, on the quietly repaired drawer track. Give each other a chance to understand each other, after all, the language of love is not just one dialect.