I noticed a phenomenon: if you shout at your child and he dares to talk back, it means that there is still hope for the family; If a child remains silent

When a child is shouted back, many parents become furious. But psychological research has found that children who dare to talk back often possess these advantageous traits. And those children who choose to remain silent actually need more attention.

1. Positive signals behind retorting

1. Outstanding language expression ability

Children who can organize language refutation have more well-developed language centers in their brains. They usually demonstrate stronger writing skills and classroom speaking enthusiasm in school.

2. Emotional regulation ability online

Children who choose to use language to fight instead of throwing away the door indicate that the prefrontal cortex is working normally. This is the 'braking system' of the brain responsible for controlling impulses.

3. The parent-child relationship is safe enough.

It's like a little lion daring to play with a lioness, and a child daring to talk back shows that he is confident that this love will not disappear. Silence may actually be a signal of emotional alienation.

2. Potential risks of silencing children

1. Formation of learned helplessness

Children who are afraid to express themselves for a long time will establish a neural circuit in their brain to resist uselessness. This model may continue into the workplace and personal relationships In a confidential relationship.

2. Hidden dangers of emotional suppression

Emotions that are not expressed will not disappear, but will transform into physical symptoms. These children are more likely to experience unexplained abdominal pain and headaches.

3. Creativity is suppressed

Children who always comply have lower brain default mode network activity. This area is the 'source of inspiration' that generates creativity.

3 steps to intelligently deal with back talk

1. Press the pause button [SEP], take a deep breath for 6 seconds and wait for the adrenaline to subside. At this point, the prefrontal cortex will come back online to avoid saying hurtful words.

2. Change the way of asking

from "How dare you talk back" to "You seem very angry, would you like to talk. Open ended questions can activate rational dialogue.

3. Demonstrating Health Conflict

can be said as follows: "I don't like being yelled at either. Can we discuss at a normal volume?" Children learn how to handle disagreements through imitation.

4. Rebuilding the Expressive Desire of Silent Children

1. Creating a Safe Environment

Starting from daily small things: "Do you want to eat carrots or broccoli today?" Simple choices can rebuild decision-making confidence.

2. Gamified communication

Use role-playing toys to evoke emotions. Plush toys often become emotional spokespersons for children.

3. Timely Positive Feedback

When a child expresses a different opinion for the first time, use "Thank you for telling me your true thoughts" to reinforce this behavior. Education experts often say that children who can talk back are like computers that can debug programs. Although the process is noisy, it indicates that the system is running normally. And the forever silent 'well behaved child' may actually be in a blue screen state of freezing. The space for children to express themselves is to install the best "antivirus software" for family relationships.