Are girls who lack love always prone to worry about gains and losses in love? Although they care deeply about each other, they always push the relationship to the brink of danger. In fact, this is not a trick of fate, but rather the subconscious at work. The unfulfilled emotional needs of childhood are quietly affecting your loved ones Confidential relationship.
1. Typical dating patterns of loveless individuals
1. Excessive solicitation
requires a partner to report their itinerary 24 hours a day, and if there is no response within 5 minutes, they will experience emotional breakdown. This suffocating love often pushes the other person further and further away.
2. Satisfying and sacrificing type
is afraid to express real needs and always seeks compromise. The accumulated resentment in the end will become a timed explosion in the relationship Bullet.
3. Repetitive probing type
deliberately creates conflicts to verify whether the other party cares, just like constantly tearing open a wound to see if it will heal.
2. Three steps to rebuild a sense of security
1. Establish an emotion recognition system
When anxiety strikes, ask yourself: "Is the current emotion from the present or past trauma?" Labeling emotions can effectively reduce impulsive behavior.
2. Setting Health Boundaries
allows partners to have their own space, just like plants need a suitable growth distance. It can be agreed that "I will directly explain when I need to be alone, it's not that I don't love you."
3. Cultivate an emotional reserve box
Develop interests and hobbies, make friends with girlfriends, and provide diversified outlets for emotional needs. A study found that people with three or more social support points have a 62% reduction in love anxiety.
3. The Golden Rule of Partner communication
1. Replace blame with "my statement"
Replace "you always don't care about me" with "I need to feel more cared for", the latter can make the other person understand rather than defend.
2. Set a shelf life for negative emotions
Agree to argue for no more than 30 minutes and pause at the appointed time. This time is enough to vent emotions without excessively consuming them.
3. Create common memory points
Hold fixed ceremonies every week, such as Wednesday movie nights or weekend breakfast dates. Stable moments of happiness can repair insecure attachments.
4. Daily Practice for Self Healing
1. Writing an Emotional Diary
Record emotional fluctuations for 10 minutes every day, and look back after three months to see the progress trajectory.
2. Mindfulness Breathing Training
When anxious, do the 4-7-8 breathing technique: inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7 seconds, exhale for 8 seconds, repeat 5 times to calm down.
3. Design a Self Soothing Plan
Prepare a personalized soothing playlist, aromatherapy, or plush toys to give yourself a gentle hug during emotional storms. True love does not need to be proven through pain. When you start taking care of yourself like you do with rare plants, the love problems that once made you anxious and uneasy will gradually become easy daily tasks to deal with. Remember, only by turning yourself into a safe harbor can you welcome true love that is anchored.
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