Female Growth Course: The Three Most Important Words in Marriage, the Earlier You Understand, the Better

Marriage is like a duet yoga, with seemingly elegant and harmonious movements hidden behind countless details that require tacit cooperation. A best friend who has been married for ten years quietly told me that she discovered the secret to maintaining a marriage is not "I love you", but three simpler words - unfortunately, most people understand it too late.

1. Independence is more important than dependence

1. Economic autonomy is the confidence

Women who can control their own bank card balance often have more say in marriage. The state of not having to ask for money for every expense can avoid many conflicts caused by trivial expenses. Maintaining competitiveness in the workplace is like giving marriage insurance.

2. Leave a blank space in the spiritual world

Put all emotions on your partner, just like putting eggs in the same basket. Cultivate your own interests and hobbies, regularly gather with girlfriends, and reserve time for solitude to recharge. When your sources of happiness are diversified, your expectations for marriage will be more rational.

2. communication is more effective than guessing

1. Expressing needs in a straight ball style

Many women are accustomed to making the other person guess their thoughts, often resulting in a lose lose situation. Try using "I hope you pick up the child every Wednesday" instead of "You never care about home". Specific and clear requests can improve communication efficiency. Marriage therapists have found that 80% of arguments stem from inappropriate expressions.

2. Listening requires a translator

Men expressing "I'm so tired from work today" may mean they want to be alone, but saying "I can eat whatever I want" is actually really aimless. Establishing a dedicated communication password book to record your partner's language habits can avoid many ineffective arguments. Before an important conversation, it may be helpful to confirm: "Are you suitable to talk about this now?"

3. Growth lasts longer than compromise

1. Synchronized updates of life version

When one party rushes forward in the workplace and the other party stagnates, it is easy to become the most familiar stranger. Regularly communicate career plans and learn new skills together, such as taking a driver's license exam or learning a foreign language. Maintaining a similar pace of growth is the key to preventing marriage from becoming a single player game.

2. Leave a buffer period for change

It's better to discuss phased goals and ask yourself if you can accept gradual changes when trying to change your partner's lifestyle habits. Marriage experts suggest replacing 'you must change this' with' how about we try this'. Marriage is not about finding the perfect person, but about using wise eyes to discover the beauty in imperfection. Those couples who can grow old together often understand the magic of these three words early on - they are not earth shattering vows, but the hidden "I am here" in the morning kiss every day, the half "let you go first" left when squeezing toothpaste, and the "drink hot" sticker on the thermos when working overtime late at night.