The better you treat a man, the less he cherishes him? 90% of girls have stepped on these 3 psychological traps

Have you ever noticed that sometimes when you prepare love lunch boxes for your boyfriend, proactively plan your date schedule, or even silently take on household chores, what you get in return is not gratitude but his natural response? It's not that you're not good enough, but there are several interesting psychological switches hidden in human nature.

1. Overgiving triggers the "marginal diminishing effect"

1. Sweetness becomes a daily routine

Every day, the unwavering good morning and good night, the thoughtful gifts that are necessary for festivals, these small things that start to make people feel tempted, when they become a fixed routine, the dopamine secreted by the brain will gradually decrease. Just like eating chocolate cake continuously for a month, no matter how delicious it is, it will become greasy.

2. Dilated sense of value

When your goodness becomes readily available, the other person subconsciously lowers its preciousness. The limited edition sneakers are being snapped up, but the pair often worn in the wardrobe is rarely cherished, and this principle also applies in relationships.

2. Unilateral investment disrupts the balance of the relationship

1. Invisible emotional debt

Long term unilateral investment can create an unbalanced psychological account in the relationship, and the recipient may have two reactions: either the pressure doubles due to the inability to receive equal returns, or the investment is recklessly overdrawn like an interest free loan.

2. Depriving the other party of their sense of participation

Taking care of all the details of life may seem considerate, but in reality, it deprives the other party of the right to manage relationships. Just like playing a two player game where you take on all the levels, your teammates may find it boring.

3. Self moving giving hides a desire for control

1. The gentle kidnapping of "I do it for you"

Staying up late knitting scarves without ever asking him if he likes the color, preparing three meals according to his own taste without caring about his preferences, this kind of giving often hides the expectation of "you should be moved".

2. Neglecting real needs

When he may need alone space, you insist on accompanying him, and only provide comfort when he wants to solve problems. It's like giving ice cream to people in the desert, no matter how expensive it is, it's not what they need the most. A healthy relationship should be like playing table tennis, where there are ups and downs to make it fun. Try to keep one of the three daily cares for yourself and keep some mystery for them to explore actively. The true attraction lies not in how much you give, but in how valuable you are.