Reality is cruel: your waiting won't bring him back

Late at night, I stumbled upon my ex's official WeChat Moments and hung my finger on the like button for three seconds before retracting it - this sour and refreshing experience is probably understood by anyone who has experienced heartbreak. Despite knowing that the other party has already left, one can't help but secretly check their chat records, and even fantasize that one day their phone will suddenly pop up their message. But the truth is often that your red rimmed eyes and thin cheeks can't even splash a splash of water at his place.

Why do we always pretend to be in our relationships; Wait for the group;

1. The Sweet Trap of the Brain

Thinking about your ex after a breakup is actually a trick played by dopamine. When in love, the brain forms a fixed excitation circuit, just like a stray cat that is fed at a fixed point every day. When feeding suddenly stops, the cat will bark even more fiercely in its old place. The longing that surges up late at night is just nerve endings begging for habitual pleasure stimulation.

2. Unfinished complex

Relationships that end unilaterally often carry a strong sense of incompleteness. Just like watching an 80 episode TV series suddenly end, people instinctively want to rewrite the ending themselves. But reality is not a film or television drama, forcing continuation will only make the plot more melodramatic.

II. Waiting consumes more than time

1. The cost of the emotional roller coaster

When repeatedly checking the other party's social dynamics, the physiological reactions such as rapid heartbeat and sweaty palms are identical to the body signals when riding the roller coaster. Being in this state for a long time, cortisol levels continue to be high, and hair and skin will be the first to send out protest signals.

2. Hidden bill of opportunity cost

Converting time into monetary units may be more intuitive: if you spend 2 hours a day worrying about your ex, three months is equivalent to wasting a full 9 working days. These times are enough to learn basic photography, read 5 professional books, or develop a new skill that can be monetized.

3. Practical Plan for Quitting Waiting

1. Physical Isolation Method

Pack old items and store them in a storage room, encrypt phone photo albums, and remove special attention from social media platforms. At the beginning, there may be itching in the hands, you can set a '; Impulse Fund; Every time I want to contact, I save money and use it to reward myself at the end of the month.

2. Emotional diversion method

Prepare an electronic diary and pour in all the things you want to say to your ex. After accumulating a certain amount and looking back, it will be found that 90% of the content is repetitive emotional waste, and this cognition itself has a healing effect.

3. Cognitive Reconstruction Method

attempts to apply "; Abandoned "; Change the narrative to '; Timely stop loss;. It's regrettable to miss the last bus, but it's better than getting into a malfunctioning vehicle. Timely withdrawal in emotions is sometimes helped by fate to avoid greater risks. What's truly worth staying up late for is the delivery logistics information, the pre-sale of idol's new album, or the aroma of bread the next morning. Turn all the gentle batteries prepared for others into self charging mode, and you will find that the blind box of life always hides better Easter eggs than the old outer room.