If a woman treats a man better and better, he will not cherish you

The more women invest in relationships, the less men cherish them? Behind this seemingly common phenomenon lies an interesting psychological mechanism. When you cook soup for him late at night, he may be scrolling through short videos; When you save money to buy him a gift, he may feel justified. This imbalance between effort and reward is quietly destroying countless relatives Confidential relationship. Why is it that the more you give, the less you are cherished?

1. The law of diminishing marginal effects

The first time I make breakfast for him, I will be moved, but on the hundredth time, it becomes' it should be like this'. Psychological experiments have shown that after three months of continuous unilateral effort, the other party's gratitude level will decrease by 72%.

2. Misalignment of Sense of Value

When women take care of all household chores, the male brain may develop the illusion that "these things are simple". Neuroscience research has found that men who do not participate in household chores gradually decrease the activity of their empathy brain regions.

3. The phenomenon of demand saturation

is like eating the same cake every day, which can make you feel tired. Oversatisfying all the other person's needs can actually reduce emotional value. Emotional experts tracked 200 couples and found that marriages that retained 30% mystery had higher levels of satisfaction.

2. 3 Tips to Make Giving Precious

1. Establish a threshold for giving

Replace the water poured casually with "Today you wash the dishes, I'll make tea". An experiment conducted by the University of California has confirmed that care that requires slight effort to obtain increases the level of appreciation by 53%.

2. Create surprise fluctuations

Fixed lunch every Wednesday? Change to random date occurrence. The brain is more sensitive to irregular rewards, which explains why game gacha is addictive.

3. Keep your own space

When he gets used to chatting with you every night, he occasionally says "I want to be alone today". Moderate withdrawal can restart the other person's emotional perception system.

3 things that are more important than giving

1. Establish an emotional account

The "deposit" withdrawn during each argument should be balanced by the appreciation and praise deposited in daily life. Calculations show that 5 positive interactions are needed to offset 1 serious conflict.

2. Cultivate shared experiences

Completing puzzles together can enhance relationships more than doing household chores every day. Neuroscience shows that the secretion of oxytocin during shared challenges is three times higher than in daily interactions.

3. Maintain self growth

Sign up for a flower arrangement class he doesn't understand and discuss new books he hasn't seen before. The Law of Attraction states that individuals who continue to grow in value will naturally increase the weight of their relationships.

4. The correct way to open a healthy relationship

1. 60 point principle

It is not necessary to be a perfect partner, leave some space for each other to complement each other. The survey shows that retaining some of the shortcomings actually leads to longer and more stable relationships.

2. Requirement expression training

Replace "You never understand me" with "I hope to wear that blue shirt on Friday date". Clear instructions can make the male brain respond more efficiently.

3. Set emotional boundaries

When he forgets the anniversary for the Nth time, calmly say, "I need to feel valued. The boundary is not estrangement, but a safety barrier for relationships. The truly mature love is not a self moving sacrifice, but the mutual nourishment of two complete souls. Remember, the best attitude to give is: I can be good to you, but first I want to be better to myself. When you begin to cherish your own value, the whole world will follow suit and cherish you.